by Johanna Lugo
When I was an infant I needed you to feed me and change me. I needed to feel your warmth and hear your soothing voice. I needed you to understand my cries and love me regardless of the sleepless nights.
As a toddler I needed you to tell me that biting others is not polite and that bugs are not food. I needed you to teach me how to differentiate colors and how to hold a pencil. I needed you to be patient whenever I made a mess yet still let my creativity flourish.
When I was a child, I needed you to show me how to ride my bike and clean my scabs when I fell. I needed to see you in the audience whenever I won an award or cheer me on at basketball games. I needed you to encourage me to play an instrument and use my talents to serve others.
As a teenager I needed you to tell me that I was beautiful regardless of the clothes that I wore. I needed you to let me explore my passions and mend my heart when it was broken. I needed you to show me how to respect myself and be a good role model to my sister.
As a college student, I needed you to write down your recipes and remind me that one test would not be the end. I needed you to let me explore the world and encourage me to follow my dreams. I needed you to remind me to trust in God and be assured that my future was in his hands.
Now, I’m an adult; and the truth is that I need you now more than ever.
I need to see your smiling face and hear your cheesy jokes. I need to hear your voice singing in the shower and feel your soft hands touch mine. I need to see you healthy once again.
I need you to teach me how to be strong and never let my faith falter. I need you to be all the things you were to me, to my sister and I need you to keep loving my dad unconditionally.
I need you to be at my wedding and celebrate all of our milestones. I need you to teach me how to be a good wife and an even better mother. I need you to spoil my kids and advise me on life changing decisions. I need you to tell me not to worry and trust that everything will work out for the best.
I still need you Mom, always have and always will.